Dear Santa,
You know I think you’re tops, but this year I need you to pull out all the stops. I need just one thing, but it hasn’t been invented. I REALLY REALLY need it, to stop me going demented.
I’ll tell you what it is, I need a vacuum cleaner, but not just a regular one – no, I need something leaner. Something that I can attach to a two year old boy – so it would be great if you had a way of making it look like a toy. I need it to be fairly heavy duty and capable of cleaning up mess, no mater how fruity. For example, the contents of a flower pot, scattered round the house, followed by the detritus of a once-stuffed mouse. And if it can cope with glue and paint, all the better. In fact, it will need a special setting for anything wetter. Which reminds me, could it have an attachment for mucus extraction? It would really save the tissue bill, and please the environment faction.You know what would also be very handy? An auto-cleaner programme for that ultra-sticky candy and days at the beach when everything is sandy.
I’m sure you’ll know what I mean, and you’ll know that I’m being good. There’s just no time for anything else – I’d try it if I could! So I’m counting down the days till this marvelous machine will come,
Until then, fly safe Santa.
Lots of love,
A Mum.
